Vorrei la porchetta

Even though it was an early flight and I was loving the time in Sardinia, I was pretty excited to be going to the biggest city in Tuscany, Florence, Fiorenza, Florentina, Firenze or whatever name it is going by these days is a great place to eat the magical animal. The people of Toscano have butchered, cured, salted and cooked pig in all kinds of different ways. These guys have been producing the different meats, la porchetta, lardo, salame, salsicce, soppressata, proscuitto and many more from the same delicious animal. As much as I enjoyed the frutti di mare of Sardinia it was definately time for some carne.

We grabbed a cab from the airport to our hotel which at 22 of the euros flat rate was definately easier with the luggage that a train. We went for a walk past the Duomo which was near where we were staying, around past the Ponte Vecchio and back into the city. Heidi did some shopping at her favourite dress shop Desigual and I had some Chianti wine at a convenient wine bar nearby. When it was lunch time we went to this little hole in the wall place called La Proscuitteria, luckily we got there in time as 10 minutes after ordering there was a line out the door. There was no menu the lady at the counter informed us "I am the menu". She said she could do a tasting platter for 5 euro each. I said that sounds awesome but I need the porchetta to be on there too. She nodded. The platter was awesome all kinds of cured pork products and the porchetta and a couple of glasses of  Chianti Classico to wash it down.

I want my house to look like this one day.

Ponte vecchio at sunset

The Uffizzi museum was completely sold out, goddam, we missed out on doing last time too, but due to time constraints. Florence in June is riddled with Americans. I think it is their holidays or something so it is harder to get anything done compared to when we came to Italy last time in August. August is pretty quiet because even the Italians go to the coastal spots instead of the cities inland, but August has the problem of being hot as balls. If you are coming in June/July book tickets to stuff in the Italian cities to avoid disappointment. Anyway we  walked around outside and looked at all the statues they had there. I had read about 1/3 of the way through Dante's Divine Comedy earlier this year and am contemplating picking up this ridiculously hard to read book again with renewed vigor after seeing the statue of Dante in the Uffizzi pallazzo.

I hope you are in purgatory Dante you hard to read mofo

The Dutch were playing the Mexicans in the footbal world cup. The Italians have given up on everything since L'Azzuri lost and there's not many places playing the world cup anymore. So we just looked up Irish and English pubs on google and sure enough we found one that was playing it. For dinner we went to the Pitti Cafe again south of the river near the Pitti Pallace. This place is known for its truffle meals. So we got some truffles with eggs, taggliatelli with truffle and truffle risotto. It was possibly the first vegitarian meal since leaving Sydney, but when you are putting shitloads of truffle on every dish it is quite easy to not miss le carne. It had started to rain lightly so we headed home and arrived back at the hotel just before a massive storm broke. I have to say the guys selling the bags, wrist bands, spinny copters and other stuff on the streets react quickly to the weather as we were offered about 20 umbrellas on the way home for purchase.

The next day after breakfast we climbed up Giotto's bell tower, the massive structure right next to the Duomo. Even though it was peak season, the line was nonexistant at I think around 10:30am which is unusual for Florentine attractions in the middle of the city. Anyway we went up the narrow stair ways on steps so narrow you sometimes had to put your foot parallel to the step to get any purchase on it, size 12 thongs were not an ideal choice here. Neither is having a mild case of claustrophobia as Heidi will no doubt attest to. A couple of minor freakouts, 3 floors of rest stops and 400 stairs later we were at the top. The view was well worth it and it is also good for working off one quarter of a panini.

The view up

The view down



The view out

We went to a couple of leather shops so Heidi could get a new handbag. It is a pity we weren't going to any 2 Michellin starred restaurants so that the nice new handbag could be put up on a pedastool like the last ratty old one Heidi had in Milano. I wanted a leather sachel for work to fit the laptop in, but they all looked like the man purses Jerry Seinfield gets one episode. Goddam is there any hilarious material about Italy Seinfield hasn't covered?

Lunch was at the markets, we got a plate of truffle spreads, some salumis and other cuts for 10 of the euros with a plastic cup of wine. I got a panino of porchetta too as when you are in Florence you want to eat pig products like a pig. We went for a walk across the river and around the streets and to a couple of Enotecas/Vino Bars along the way, as well as stopping at La Procuitteria again for a drink. There was another world cup game on France v Nigeria so we found a restaurant that was showing the game. We looked at the menu and it was 10 of the euros for a pint or spritz so we made the drinks last. To their credit we could have probably dined there on the snacks they provided with the drinks but we were holding back for dinner.

Quince paste on cheese is so 2000 and late.
Also notice the lack of crackers for the cheese?
They just get in the way of the flavour people!

Dinner was at this place our friend Ev had recommened called Osteria Vini e Vicchi Sapori. We had walked past too book before and it said on the menu, "no pizza, no bistecca, no ice, no cappucino, no takeaway". Obviously this was going to be awesome and tipicci della regione. It was really great, a cute little place and I think the old owner getting around still serving people. I decided I wanted a spaggetti al ragu(bolognase if you were going to try it this was a good place to do it outside of Bologna which was a fail last trip). We also got a pidgeon ragu pasta. Then for mains I got trippa alla fiorentina and Heidi had the carparccio. Fuck yeah, pork, pigeon, raw beef and stomach all in the in the one dinner. I was happier than a pig in errr piggie canibal land who also eats birds and cows.

The dinner was awesome. I just wish I had earbuds for the americans. Their voices seem to penetrate your own table conversation. It is not just their accent and volume. Americano quotes from nearby:
"That's pigeon? Oh no, we're not getting the pigeon".
"What's trippa?". The waiter just said if you don't know what it is you shouldn't order it.
Why don't they just go get some pizza or a freaking burger? There were other dumb things said also but luckily I had forgotten them or I would be too inscensed with rage to continue the holiday.